I Feel Broken.

I feel broken. I don't know how it got to this, my minds a mess, this can't be real. I'm stuck with my thoughts, that burn in my brain. You work, come home, do whatever you can to make them go away, but they're always there. If not in this moment, in the next. if not while you're awake, in your sleep. You can't run away from them or ask them to leave, they're always there, reminding you of how broken you are on the inside. You were once confident, had so much self-esteem and self-worth. but now you're here, wondering why you aren't good enough. Why your mind drives you crazy but somehow you just keep functioning, feeling numb as you smile to everyone around, asking how their day was. You smile because it sucks to talk about it. Nobody wants the burden of listening, and nobody wants to burden of telling. So you move on, as best you can. You keep going because thats all there is to do, because ending it all would be pointless. It wouldn't fix anything, it would just create more suffering. Maybe not for you, but for everyone around you. I wonder how i got here. I was a different person. I never wanted to be like this, I never wanted to be on anti-anxiety pills or antidepressants.. I didn't want to be told I needed a psychiatrist. I didn't want to walk in a full room feeling like i'm suffocating.

User Comments
Anon-1

sorry you feel this way, pretty much how i feel - it sucks but i hope you get through it.