Why me

I didnt ask to be born, I didnt ask to be treated the way I am. I am depressed and I dont even know how to express everything in words. I am in my 3rd year of college and just 2 more years to go and I am struggling to get an engineering degree and everyday i ask myself if this is the path I should be taking. I have a simple job at a bookstore which hardly pays for anything, I am 21 and I dotn drive nor have a permit. I have a verybly and sometimes phycialy abusive mother who is toxic and my poor sister has to live with her and I cant even help her or keep her safe from her fucked up ways. The only reason I havent killed myself if because I want to live for her and make sure she stays mentaly stable and sane. She just graduated college and has a job as a entry level teacher for kids with mental disabilties which doesnt make enough money for her to live on her own or even live with a roommate because  my mother constanly just leeches her of money even though she has a state job that pays for everything and mroe she just can fucking manage her money. Almost every other day my sister calls crying how she wants to just kill herself and it makes me ill I just dont want to live this life anymore and i dont want my sister to either.  

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