I feel really sad, the drops of tears flow like a river from my inner being, fuck i can barely breathe, i can barely look at the screen, picking myself up of the floor, I am broken inside, 100 million peices of my heart. I am shaking like a stumbling wreck, just had a massive meltdown on my own. Its not depression its letting go of someone you love a one way street.After all these years of giving, and making sure their needs are met before mine, dropping everything at the last minute, myself has disappeared, my strength gone, my mind is their but vacant like a lost desert. Life is a huge learning curve for me these days, weeks, months, spent in tears, social media, art, photography, downloading my feelings to be heard, get acceptance, recieve praise, I need praise, like as a kid you show your teacher your book and she gives you a star. (How did life get so complicated with layers) having low self asteem to begin with in life and trying hard to build it on my own, it has been knocked down several times over and over, I constantly building. Gazing pretty much motionless at this screen, lots I want to share, not sure where to start. Give me shelter, give me a home, give me that love, give me your time, give me those words, it will be ok. I just need to lay my head down on your knee and be still, I just need to be comforted, I just need my tears to stop falling.

User Comments
Anon-1

it can help if you work on yourself -  respecting yourself, understanding your flaws but not berating yourself for them and helping yourself to move on.  sounds silly but until you respect yourself, you won't be able to move on. I know its difficult but you can do it, I did and I hated myself.

Hope this might have been some help, if not I'm sorry