This is my story ...

I was born different...different from all the classmates around me. I was the hispanic kid in an all white classroom. To make matters worse, I could barely speak English. After kindergarten I moved to a different state...I was again barely speaking english in a mostly white classroom. My father was military and sometimes he would spoil me and he would be kind. Other times I was a useless "bitch",and I needed to be removed from his sight. On days he was angry, he would retort "What do you want girl?". It was terrible growing up with that dynamic. When I was 9 he left saying that he needed to go to work. He never came back. I felt a sense of betrayal... and when my mother and siblings said they had to go to work...I would hang on to them for dear life fearing they wouldn't return. After father left, my older siblings would hit me with the first thing they saw if I angered them or choke me at times. They got away with it because my mother wasn't home. I was too scared to tell her. Often times she wouldn't believe me even if I told her. Fast forward to age 16, I got a boyfriend. I thought he was perfect. My mother found out. I got slapped 8 times in the face...I got slapped 21 times on the back, I was struck twice with a belt and told if he ever raped me...she would use my blood to paint the wall...and laugh. A few months later she found out I was still talking to him she sat on top of my restraining my wrists, and slapped me four more times in the face. I wanted to die, if I knew this was going to be my new forever. I was grounded. I could only speak to him in secret twice every two weeks. As soon as I turned 18 and was headed for college I was excited. But then I found out that my mother only gave me enough money after I graduated to apply to the nearby community college. I wanted to go to college an hour away...I flunked through college my only desire was to see and talk to my boyfriend. I hated the community college. I didn't feel like I fit in I wanted to live on campus...but of course my mother didn't approve. At 19 I married my boyfriend only to find out his family hates me. I married in secret and I didn't want everyone's opinion over how I should wait to get married several more years. My now husband has a job but he spends every second of his down time on his phone or laptop. I resent him deeply for it.

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